I think she said something about the Bastille...

Lisboa - why do we call it Lisbon and them Lisboa?

We got out of the train and asked the cops where our street was and they didn´t know. How the hell are they supposed to respond to something if they don´t know where it is? We get up to our hostel and there is a bum sleeping across from it. The streets are crazy - hilly and tiled and it is hard to walk. We get to the hostel and get inside and get to our room. We unload our stuff and head to some Moroccan place to get dinner. Basically, you walk through the metro station to the other side and up an bunch of escalators. There´s a section of the city that at some point was in rebellion against the government and it´s very hippie and loose there. Lots of drugs. I guess because I´m wearing a Mets hat, it must mean that I´m from NY and do a lot of blow. Every 20ft some skell is asking me if we want hash or cocaine - and they get pissed off when you tell them no. Hey, I am from NY and you can go fuck yourself. What do you think about that?

The food was pretty good. I think I had some kind of chicken with stuff in it. Or did I have some mystery meat? I don´t remember. I think it was mystery meat because it was a little chewy and dark. We walked back to the hostel after dinner and showered, in a decent bathroom and watched some TV in English. Which by the way all it is is liberal TV, CNN international, BBC and fucking Al Jazeera in English. What a bunch of hippocrates. They have this super hot chick as the announcer. How do I know she was hot? She wasn´t wearing a burka, she wasn´t covered in anything. Hmmmm - propaganda? I think so. It was the first of a BUNCH we would see.

The next day we got up and the bum was gone. We had breakfast - ooooo, cereal as well as bread, bonus! We then headed to the castello, yes, another castle. It had some awesome views of Lisbon. On the way up to it there was a urinal. Not just any urinal but one connected to the wall of the castle and it had it´s own walls so you could go in and take a wizz. I thought this was pretty bizarre but then again we may have seen something similar last year. I don´t remember, things are starting to look the same, the castles, the palaces, the Cat-eh-drals, the urinals...

Afterwards we headed to the Cathedral and to find some caches. There was one outside the cathedral and we had to be mad stealthy because there was a cop right there but we got it. The inside of the cathedral was nothing special but in the cloisters, they were digging. There was a ton of stuff from an old Roman road to Islamic houses to walls from the 1800s. It was pretty cool. They had dug up a ton of stuff.

We then headed down to the main square near our hostel and hopped on a tram to get to some monastery. We get on and there´s this woman screaming and yelling in French. Yes, French. We´re in Portugal and the EDP is screaming and yelling in French. She was remarkably clean for an EDP and had a bag or two from having just gone shopping. The guy sitting next to her is finding it humorous and talking to the people across from him. Then some dude gets on the tram and tells her to stop speaking French. You´re in Portugal, he tells her, so speak Portuguese. She doesn´t like this and begins to yell back at him in her rant. And during all this, I hear her yell something familiar. She continues ranting and Jess finally says to me, what is she yelling about. I reply, I don´t know but I think I heard her yell something about the Bastille. And Jess is like, no way. Then the guy in front of us turns around and says, yeah, I speak French and she did yell something about the Bastille but I don´t think she´s French! We see the monastery and get off but I really wanted to stay on to see what the hell she was yelling about.

The monastery was pretty cool. Supposedly it has the remains of Vasco da Gama. We walked around a bit and grabbed some pictures. We then left and headed to the most famous tower in Portugal. I don´t know what it´s called but it was cool. It used to be connected to the land but now it has eroded and it stands out in the water a bit. We didn´t go in because it didn´t look too tall or that you could get awesome views. We headed back to the hostel because it was pretty friggin hot and we needed lunch and a nap.

So, we´re napping and all of a sudden there´s a bunch of chanting and screaming and yelling right under our window. I get up to see what the hell it is and it´s the fucking Communist Party! Yes, the Commies. I guess there was an election coming up and everyone was getting there voice out there. Why Communism? Sure, ideologically, it´s a great idea but has there been one Communist government that has not been taken over by a dictator and exploited by the corrupt? I´m going to get off the soapbox but believe me, there´s a ton more to cover.

We ate dinner at the hostel with some of the other guests. you can get a two course dinner, in this case gaspacho, sheppherd´s pie and wine for 7 €. It was a pretty good time. There were mostly chicks there from Australia, the one next to me was from Sweden and she left her boyfriend and two year old kid at home while she went on a little vacation (weird but hey, she´s European). So we hung out and bullshitted, skipped going to see some Fado music and hit the sack - only to be woken up by the same broads at 5 am screaming and yelling, the Aussie, trying to bum a cigarette off the bum who slept across from our window. I believe I also heard her say she made out with some guy so she could get some hits of hash. Skank - Australian for Classy!

We got up early in the am our bum had packed but was only down the block (he´s an early riser) and went and did a cache which we thought we only needed a picture but luckily, Jess found the micro as I was packing up the camera. Sweet! We headed to the airport on the bus - which was friggin overcrowded. At what point does the mathematics kick in? No one gets off and it´s packed - how many people should get on? Apparently as many as can squeeze in. I was going to start charging every guy who went past me 5 € for doing so. I was getting sore again.

At the airport they almost didn´t let me on and said that my bag was too big, which was crap since we had just flown the airline from Barcelona to Grenada. I took out the camera and my bag and the guy not even our ticket person was still being a dick but Jess sweet talked her and she let us go. The guy shrugged his shoulders like a douche. Off to Madrid.

Speaking of douchy guys, everyone here is very effeminate. It´s great - a whole continent of people who´s asses I know I can kick, no problem! They´re all very, very effeminate. They hold their cigarettes like girls, and I think they prefer to pee in the toilet or sitting down.

That´s not a joke either. There´s always a line for the toilets and no one using the urinals. I know they´re only peeing because they´re done in two second, there´s pee on every seat and it can´t possibly be that all these guys need to shit at the same time.

On to Madrid!